Do you struggle to forgive people? I sometimes do. I am very forgiving in most situations and
for most people. When someone cuts me in
line at the market, or a friend says a hurtful comment I am quick to
forgive. Life is too short to dwell on
such petty things. However, when
someone has developed a track record of hurting me I find it difficult to
forgive. This difficulty is increased
when the people who wronged me refuse to accept responsibility, humble
themselves, and ask for forgiveness.
With that
being said, the bible is very clear that forgiveness is a key component of the
Christian walk. GOD forgave us for our
multitude of sins, therefore we ought to forgive our brothers and sisters. Here are some verses to ponder:
“Get rid of all
bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of
malice. Be kind and compassionate to one
another, forgiving each other, jus as in Christ GOD forgave you.” ~Ephesians
4:31-32.
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked: Lord, how many times
shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times? Jesus answers: I tell you,
not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”
~Matthew 18: 21-22
“Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you
may have against one another. Forgive as
the LORD forgave you.” ~Colossians 4:13
What is
forgiveness? What does it look
like? According to the Mayo Clinic,
forgiveness “Is a decision to let go of resentment and thoughts of revenge”
(See link below). Based on this
definition I have forgiven everyone who hurt me. I am not really the type to do revenge. I am able to see the brokenness of the sinner
between the sin(s) they committed against me.
Even if I don’t want anything bad happening to someone, I don’t
necessarily want certain people in my life anymore. Does this make my forgiveness void?
No.
I think
people try to create a grey area between forgiveness and reconciliation. Forgiveness can happen immediately, but true
reconciliation can only happen if the
offending party asks for forgiveness and repents.
“If your brother
sins, rebuke him. If he repents,
forgive him. If he sins against you
seven times a day and seven times comes back to you and asks for forgiveness,
you must forgive him. ~ Luke 17:4.
Does this mean I have to forgive
and restore a friendship if someone has a track record of hurting me? No. Rick Warren once said: “Forgiveness must be
immediate, whether or not a person asks for it. Trust must be rebuilt over time. Trust requires a track record. If someone hurts you repeatedly, you are
commanded by GOD to forgive them instantly, but you are not expected to trust
them immediately, and you are not expected to continue allowing them to hurt
you.”
I have
searched my heart and I truly believe that I have forgiven people who have
wronged me. I am not seeking to harm
another person. I am not retaliating
against anyone. However, in some cases
it is not imperative for me to restore a relationship with someone who hurt
me. Trust must be built up over
time. Reconciliation must happen in
order to fully restore a relationship.
What can I do to keep the peace in my own heart toward someone who hurt
me?
“Bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat
you.”
~Luke 6:28
You are
commanded to forgive someone who sins against you. The bible also commands that you bless those
who hurt you and pray for those who mistreat you. I set a timer and specifically pray for an
individual for 3 minutes everyday. I
pray for GOD to soften her/his heart. I
pray that GOD bless that offending party with protection, love, comfort and
peace. I pray for GOD to reconcile
myself with the offending party. I
speak promises from Scripture into the other person’s life.
~Sunny :D
MAYO CLINIC LINK:
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