Soul mate or God's best?

When it comes to Christian dating, there seems to be two trains of thought.

"God's choice"
There is "one" and he/she is the only one I am supposed to be with and GOD decided who I was going to marry a long time ago and I am going to wait until he reveals who this person is.

"Your choice"
GOD gave us free will to decide who we should choose.  The bible states they must be a Christian, other than that, it is your choice.   We should use our free will to choose the best match for us.

Which line of thinking is right?

I read a lot of articles where the authors believe that we single Christians "over-spiritualize" it and make dating a lot more complicated than it has to be.  I agree with this line of thought..

However,

I want the one GOD's wants for me.  I want to find that guy who is so perfect for me that we go together like peanut butter and jelly.   I don't want any doubts or hesitations.

People tell me that when he is the right one, we will both "just know".

My tummy sometimes gets anxious thinking I might be stepping out of GOD's will when I try to take matters into my own hands.

I am at a good place in my career. I have reached my educational goals.   I don't have sin problems (Strong holds) that I know about.    I have a strong relationship with GOD.  People at my church consider me a Godly women and nobody has any idea why I am still single.

And I don't get it either!

I have asked GOD to search my heart so I could find the reason I am still single~

GOD is silent.

I have always avoided internet dating and "getting out there" because I am afraid I will miss out on GOD's best because I am wasting all my time with the wrong guys.   I figured if I was faithful to GOD and involved in my church GOD would eventually bring "the one" to me.   I know people who maintain multiple dating website accounts, they attend multiple singles events & groups, they do everything they can to find "the one".

And they have not found him/her yet.

I have trouble doing that.   I can't sign up for dating websites because  I find it a waste of time and money.   I feel like I am trying to play God with my love life.

Yet, I have not had a date in 2 years.

But~  I also did not feel "ready" to date two years ago.

I feel like I am in a much better place to get into a relationship than I was two years ago.  I do feel like GOD has been working on my heart and trying to prepare me for marriage.

Give me the patience to wait a little longer Oh, LORD..

~Sunny :D