How you make me feel...

I feel butterflies when you walk in the room.   Sometimes I can't even speak. 

The second I laid eyes on you~ I felt something.

Things are different with you.

I was so nervous I could not even speak to you.

I had to walk away.

I had to run.

I can't explain it.

I am usually very confident, but around you that confidence would fade.

People tell me about you~ I always hear you name.

You are an Amazing Man of GOD

Strong, intelligent, hard-working and kind.

You sound perfect for me.

If only I could speak to you~ 

instead of run and hide.

A year ago I noticed that you had noticed me.

A new haircut, new clothes and you were starring at me.

I tried to ignore you and push you away.

I know you are "that guy".

They one every girl wants to date. 

And I was not sure why you were watching me. 

Soon, you made more effort.

You started coming around.

You smiled, you were warm.

You were exactly what they said you were. 

Kind and gentle man of GOD.

I am falling for you~

This cannot be happening to me.

Not with you~ 

I push you away because I am so afraid of getting hurt.

I prayed for GOD to take away the butterflies.

Please take these feelings away!

I can't tell you how many times I prayed 

You would leave. 

You continue to pursue me, and my heart begins to swoon.

We have so much in common

As I get to know you, I like you more and more. 

I am no longer afraid of you

I am starting to see you as everyone else sees you.

We are becoming friends. 

Then you disappear~ you won't even say a word.

You no longer stare at me 

You cancelled plans

And I am left wondering..

What did I do wrong?

Where do you go?

 I hate the way you make me feel.  

Those butterflies are still there 

I am giving you space and taking mine as well.

I prayed for GOD to take those butterflies away.

I prayed for you to leave.  

But you continued to pursue me

and now you are gone.

My heart is broken.  My spirit is disheartened. 

Perhaps I knew the ending to this sad story before it began.

My gut was right, you were just going to hurt me.

And now I am left in a pool of tears.

I am not sure why you pursued me, but I hope you realize

that my heart is fragile and more than just a toy

Please leave me alone and I will do the same for you!

I know it is not fair, I don't want to "be your friend".

I want you out of my life

Unless you are willing to give me

So I need to assume he does not. 

Which is difficult and makes me feel like I have to stuff my feelings into a box.