The "Gift" of Singleness

Imagine it is Christmas Day and you are unwrapping a present from your great aunt who always gives the gifts you never want.   You open the gift and pretend you love it (so you don’t hurt her feelings).   Secretly you decide in your head that you want to either re-gift the item at the next office white elephant party or exchange it for something better.

Sometimes I view singleness as a gift from my great aunt.   How can this possibly be a gift when the ENTIRE WORLD is treating you like an outcast?  Singleness is not a gift; it’s a struggle, a fight, a battle.   You are left wondering if there is something wrong with you.  You over-analyze everything you say and do.  You wonder if you need to wear more make-up or dress differently.  It makes friendships with the opposite sex incredibly awkward. (This is especially true if they are single and near your age).   You wonder if GOD loves you.  You question if he has forgotten about you.   You don’t feel like you belong anywhere.

It’s easy to get sucked into the lie that your life is empty and meaningless.

How exactly is this a gift?

            GOD loves us and desires us to live abundantly.  He wants us to be content in EVERY stage of life.    Scripture states that singleness is a gift and I wish I could enjoy it more than I do.  I know as a single I have blessings that married folks don’t have.   I can spend my money the way I see fit.  I don’t have to be accountable to a husband about my time.   I don’t have kids so I have the ability to take showers and go to the bathroom by myself.  (From what I hear, most mothers envy this).  I can go on vacations with a drop of a hat.   I have a freedom that most women my age don’t have.    I have vast amounts of time to serve the LORD.   “An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the LORD’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the LORD in both her body & Spirit.” ~1 Corinthians 7:34

            The Apostle Paul loved being single.   I have a few other friends that LOVE being single.  They are not willing to trade in their freedom for the security of marriage.   Paul was granted the “gift” of being single .  How did he do it?  How do modern folks find the joy of being single in a world that is so family-focused?

            I have really been praying about this to GOD.  I want to find the joy in the “gift” of singlehood.  I recently went to a bible bookstore to get a new highlighting pencil for my bible.  I ended up in the Singles interest section (and by section I mean 1 small shelf with 8 books on it).    Most of those books are either about “waiting on GOD to bring you a mate” or they are books to help you select a mate.   But, what if you believe you are being called to stay single for a while?  I want to know what to do with my life right now instead of sitting around waiting for something to happen.  Is there a book for people like me? 

I found a book titled: “THRIVE: The single life as GOD intended”.       It’s written by a women well into her 40’s who is single and living a full life.    I read the back cover and read:  “This is a feminine version of the Apostle Paul.  Get excited about your life: Freedom.  Joy.   Abundance.  Hope.   Embrace all that GOD has for you right now”.

I can’t tell you how excited I am about this book.    I can’t wait to finish this blog post so I can dive into this good book.

~Sunny :D